From:	Andy Schipper 
Sent:	Friday, August 14, 1998 10:25 AM
To:	Andrea Leach; Babita Duggal; Greg Hammond; Heather Stuart-Obee;
John Prostran; Katherine Stoll; Lori Dermott; Tajinder Toor; Teresa
DaSilva; Victor  Shimla
Subject:	FW: Bill

Subject:	Bill

Subject: Clinton Jokes - some fresh ones
As Air Force One prepares to land, the captain makes his customary
request over the loudspeaker: "Mr. President, would you please
return
the stewardess to the upright position and prepare to land?"
Q : What's the difference between Clinton and a screwdriver?
A : A screwdriver turns in screws, Clinton screws interns!
Did you hear that Clinton has announced there is a new national
bird?
 -- the spread eagle
A reporter asked Clinton one day. " Was Monica lying?"
Clinton responded by saying. " No she was on her knees.
Q : Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill every day at 5 am?
A : She wants to make sure that she is the first lady.
The Spelling Bee...Dan Quayle, Frank Gifford and Bill Clinton were
in
a spelling contest.
Unbelievably, Dan Quayle won! He was the only one of the three who
knew that 'harass' was one word.
Q : How many White House Interns does it take to screw in a light
bulb?
A : None, they are to busy screwing the President.
Women in Washington DC were asked if they would have sex with the
President. 86% said "Not again."
Clinton's team of advisors have offered the following defense...
Clinton NEVER told Lewinsky to lie in disposition! He told her to
lie
in THIS position....
Q : What do Monica Lewinsky and Bob Dole have in common?
A : They were both upset when Bill finished first.
Q : What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
A : When Hillary is out of   town.
Q : What is the difference between Clinton and the Titanic?
A : Only 200 women went down on the Titanic.
Q : Why is Clinton so interested in events in the Middle East?
A : He thinks the Gaza Strip is a topless bar.