Ä Area: N-Comedy ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ Msg#: 1944 Date: 07-16-93 15:03 From: Rudy Boghina Read: Yes Replied: No To: All Mark: Subj: The Holy Grail.... 10/12 ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ Continued from previous message. of them! DINGO: Yes, yes, he'll beat us easily, we haven't a chance. GIRLS: Yes, yes. [boom] DINGO: Oh, shit. [outside] LAUNCELOT: We were in the nick of time, you were in great peril. GALAHAD: I don't think I was. LAUNCELOT: Yes you were, you were in terrible peril. GALAHAD: Look, let me go back in there and face the peril. LAUNCELOT: No, it's too perilous. GALAHAD: Look, [something] as much peril as I can. LAUNCELOT: No, we've got to find the Holy Grail. Come on! GALAHAD: Well, let me have just a little bit of peril? LAUNCELOT: No, it's unhealthy. GALAHAD: Bet you're gay! LAUNCELOT: No, I'm not. Narrative Interlude NARRATOR: Sir Launcelot had saved Sir Galahad from almost certain temptation, but they were still no nearer the Grail. Meanwhile, King Arthur and Sir Bedemir, not more than a swallow's flight away, had discovered something. Oh, that's an unladen swallow's flight, obviously. I mean, they were more than two laden swallow's flights away -- four, really, if they hadn't a cord of line between them. I mean, if the birds were walking and dragging-- CROWD: Get on with it! NARRATOR: Oh, anyway, on to scene twenty-four, which is a smashing scene with some lovely acting, in which Arthur discovers a vital clue, in which there aren't any swallows, although I think you can hear a starling -oolp! Scene 12 OLD MAN: Ah, hee he he ha! ARTHUR: And this enchanter of whom you speak, he has seen the grail? OLD MAN: Ha ha he he he he! ARTHUR: Where does he live? Old man, where does he live? OLD MAN: He knows of a cave, a cave which no man has entered. ARTHUR: And the Grail... The Grail is there? OLD MAN: Very much danger, for beyond the cave lies the Gorge of Eternal Peril, which no man has ever crossed. ARTHUR: But the Grail! Where is the Grail!? OLD MAN: Seek you the Bridge of Death. ARTHUR: The Bridge of Death, which leads to the Grail? OLD MAN: Hee hee ha ha! Scene 13 HEAD KNIGHT: Nee! Nee! Nee! Nee! ARTHUR: Who are you? HEAD KNIGHT: We are the Knights Who Say... Nee! ARTHUR: No! Not the Knights Who Say Nee! HEAD KNIGHT: The same! BEDEMIR: Who are they? HEAD KNIGHT: We are the keepers of the sacred words: Nee, Pen, and Nee-wom! RANDOM: Nee-wom! ARTHUR: Those who hear them seldom live to tell the tale! HEAD KNIGHT: The Knights Who Say Nee demand a sacrifice! ARTHUR: Knights of Nee, we are but simple travellers who seek the enchanter who lives beyond these woods. HEAD KNIGHT: Nee! Nee! Nee! Nee! ARTHUR and PARTY: Oh, ow! HEAD KNIGHT: We shall say 'nee' again to you if you do not appease us. ARTHUR: Well, what is it you want? HEAD KNIGHT: We want... a shrubbery! [dramatic chord] ARTHUR: A what? HEAD KNIGHT: Nee! Nee! ARTHUR and PARTY: Oh, ow! ARTHUR: Please, please! No more! We shall find a shrubbery. HEAD KNIGHT: You must return here with a shrubbery or else you will never pass through this wood alive! ARTHUR: O Knights of Nee, you are just and fair, and we will return with a shrubbery. HEAD KNIGHT: One that looks nice. ARTHUR: Of course. HEAD KNIGHT: And not too expensive. ARTHUR: Yes. HEAD KNIGHTS: Now... go! Scene 14 NARRATOR: The Tale of Sir Launcelot. Continued in next message. * "And now, for something completely different..." -!- ž RoseReader 2.10į P003789 Entered at [CRS] ž RoseMail 2.10į: CRS Online, Toronto, On.