From:	Anthony Morris [SMTP:amorris@idirect.com]
 Sent:	Friday, November 06, 1998 7:53 PM
 
 Subject:	Fw: A little Harsh!
 
 How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to
 do the dishes?
      Both of them.
      __________________
 Why did the man cross the road?
      He heard the chicken was a slut.
      __________________
 Why don't women blink during foreplay?
      They don't have time.
      _________________
 Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
           They won't stop to ask directions.
      __________________
 What do men and sperm have in common?
      They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human
 being.
      _________________
 How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
      He buys two cases of beer.
      _________________
 What is the difference between men and government bonds?
      The bonds mature.
      __________________
 Why are blonde jokes so short?
    So men can remember them.
      ________________
 How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
    We don't know; it has never happened.
      _________________
 Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good
 looking?
    They all already have boyfriends.
     _________________
 What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
    A widow.
      __________________
 When do you care for a man's company?
      When he owns it.
      __________________
 What are a woman's four favorite animals?
    A mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the
 bedroom, and an ass to pay for it all.
     __________________
 Why are married women heavier than single women?
    Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
    Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
      _________________
 How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
    His hand caught fire.
      __________________
 How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
    Put the remote control between his toes
     ___________________
 What did God say after creating man?
    I must be able to do better than that.
      ___________________
 What did God say after creating Eve?
    "Practice makes perfect."
      ___________________
 How are men and parking spots alike?
    The good ones are always taken.
    The rest are either handicapped or extremely small.
      ___________________
 What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
    They're married.
      _______________
 Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
 God says: "So you would love her."
 "But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
 God says: "So she would love you."