From: Greg Hammond Sent: Wednesday, October 28, 1998 3:56 PM Subject: FW: Your daily Joke BEST EXCUSES IF YOU GET CAUGHT SLEEPING IN YOUR OFFICE OR CUBICLE They told me at the blood bank this might happen. This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to. I was working smarter - not harder. Whew! I must've left the top off the liquid paper. I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm! This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people! I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance. I'm in the management training program. I'm actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend. This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work! I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress. Do you discriminate against people who practice Yoga? Damn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem. The coffee machine is broken.... Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot. Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off. Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic! I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands. The mail courier flipped out and pulled a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot. Geez, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day.